Jordan Ellis
When a loved one is in the hospital, it can be challenging to know what to say or do. It's important to show empathy and offer comfort, but also to keep the context in mind, such as the severity of their illness and the expected recovery time. Whether you choose to visit, call, or send a message, your support can make a huge difference in their recovery journey. It's thoughtful to send a personalized message or gift that suits their interests and circumstances. If they are seriously ill, avoid feel better soon wishes, and instead, express your care and support, letting them know you are thinking of them. For less serious situations, humor can be a great coping mechanism, and you can send a funny video or make a light-hearted joke. Ultimately, the goal is to provide encouragement and a sense of normalcy through your actions and words.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Illness Severity | If the person is seriously ill or may not recover, avoid "feel better soon" wishes. |
| Communication Medium | In-person visits, phone calls, text messages, cards, and emails are all viable options. |
| Communication Tone | Be empathetic, comforting, and sincere. Use humor carefully, considering the relationship and context. |
| Communication Content | Express love and support, and positive thoughts. Offer practical help and encouragement. Share memories and let them know they are missed. |
| Gifts | Send "heat-and-eat" meals, albums or printed photos of friends, family, and pets, or other gifts that inspire and provide mental stimulation. |
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What You'll Learn
Sending cards, gifts, and messages
Cards and Messages
When writing a card or message to someone in the hospital, it's important to consider the context, including the seriousness of their illness and their expected recovery time. If the person is seriously ill or may not recover, avoid saying, "feel better soon," as this may not be appropriate. Instead, express your sorrow for their illness and let them know that you're thinking about them. You can say something like, "I just wanted to let you know that I'm thinking about you," or "I heard that you're in the hospital - sending all my good vibes your way."
It's also good to consider your relationship with the person and how well you know them. The better you know them, the better you can gauge what kind of message they might appreciate. If you have a close relationship, a joking text or card can be a great way to bring some humour and lightness to their day. However, be mindful of their situation and emotions; a joke might not land well, depending on their circumstances.
Gifts
When it comes to gifts, thoughtful and practical items can make a big difference. Consider sending a heat-and-eat meal to save them the trouble of cooking. Alternatively, you could offer to bring them their favourite meal or a care package with comforting items. Gifts that provide mental stimulation, such as a book or magazine they might enjoy, can also be a good choice, especially for patients who need lengthy rest and recovery.
Personalized gifts, such as a small album or printed photographs of friends, family, and pets, can be a wonderful way to brighten their hospital room and provide inspiration during their recovery. Plus, these gifts give hospital staff a glimpse into the patient's life outside of their illness.
Remember, whether you're sending cards, gifts, or messages, the most important thing is to show your empathy and offer comfort. A simple expression of your care and support can go a long way.
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Visiting and calling
Visiting:
- Consider the patient's preferences and energy levels: Before visiting, check with the patient or their family to ensure they are up for a visit. Respect their wishes if they prefer limited visitors or alone time.
- Bring a piece of the outside world: During a hospital stay, patients can feel disconnected from their everyday lives. Bring photos of friends, family, and pets to decorate their room. This can provide encouragement and a sense of normalcy.
- Offer practical help: Instead of just asking, "Is there anything I can do?", offer specific assistance. This could be running an errand, bringing a meal, or helping with personal care if appropriate.
- Create a positive environment: If the patient is well enough, bring activities or items that can brighten their day and provide a distraction from their illness. This could be a book, a game, or their favourite music.
Calling:
- Keep conversations short and casual: A phone call can be a welcome distraction, but be mindful of the patient's energy levels. Keep calls brief and light, especially if they are feeling unwell.
- Share news and updates: Let the patient know about what's happening outside the hospital. Share funny stories or anecdotes to lift their spirits and help them feel included.
- Express your support: Let the patient know you are thinking of them and that you care. Avoid saying, "Feel better soon" if they have a serious or long-term illness. Instead, express your sorrow that they are going through a difficult time and offer your help.
- Follow up with a text or card: After the call, send a quick text or handwritten card to let the patient know you're thinking of them. This can be a nice way to continue showing your support when you're not able to visit or call.
Remember, the most important thing is to show your empathy and offer comfort in a way that feels genuine and appropriate for your relationship with the patient.
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Using humour
Firstly, it's important to consider the context and the nature of your relationship with the person. Humour can be a wonderful coping mechanism, but it's crucial to avoid making jokes at the person's expense or using humour that could be considered offensive. Avoid topics such as race, culture, politics, or religion, and steer clear of making light of their specific illness or condition unless they have already indicated that this is something they are comfortable with.
If the person has a good sense of humour and an easy-going nature, they might appreciate some light-hearted quips and puns related to hospital life. For example:
"Why did the patient bring a suitcase to the hospital? He heard it was a place for 'packing'!"
"The doctor said my test results were back, but all I heard was 'test' and 'results'—sounds like a pop quiz!"
"When I asked the nurse about my recovery, she said, 'You're in good hands—just don't let them slip!'"
"Why did the nurse always carry a pencil? In case they needed to draw blood!"
If the person you're writing to is facing a long-term stay or a more serious situation, humour can still play a role in their recovery. Sharing funny videos, telling jokes, or simply reminiscing about light-hearted memories can provide a much-needed distraction and help to boost their mood. It can also help to strengthen your bond and remind them of their identity beyond their illness.
Remember, the goal is to bring a smile to their face and create a warm, positive atmosphere. So, use your judgement, keep things tasteful, and adapt your humour to suit their unique personality and sense of humour.
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Expressing empathy and offering comfort
Recognise Their Feelings
Consider how the person might be feeling, both physically and emotionally. If they are seriously ill or may not recover, avoid saying, "feel better soon". Instead, express your sorrow that they are sick and assure them that you are thinking about them. For instance, you could say, "I heard you're in the hospital. I'm so sorry you're going through this. I want you to know that I'm thinking of you."
Offer Practical Help
Instead of just wishing them well, offer practical help or support. This could be in the form of a phone call, a short visit, a card, or a thoughtful gift. For example, you could send them a heat-and-eat meal or a small album of photographs of friends, family, and pets to inspire them and provide a sense of normalcy.
Use Humour Carefully
If the person in the hospital has a less serious illness or injury, humour can be an excellent coping mechanism. However, be mindful of the circumstances and your relationship with the person. A joke or a funny video can brighten their day, but it could also come across as insensitive. Make sure the humour is appropriate for the situation and something you know they would appreciate.
Keep in Touch
A quick text, phone call, or card can go a long way in letting the person know you care. Keep the conversation casual and light, and let them know you are thinking of them. For example, "Hey, just wanted to let you know that I miss seeing you at work! We're all rooting for you and hope you're back on your feet soon."
Encourage Social Interaction
Hospital stays can be isolating, so encourage social interaction when appropriate. If they are up for it, suggest a short visit or offer to include them in social activities they usually participate in. This can provide a sense of normalcy and encourage them in their recovery.
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Sending practical wishes
Meals and Comforts of Home
Sending a heat-and-eat meal is a thoughtful gesture, especially if the person is facing a long recovery or has a busy family. You could also offer to stock their fridge with their favourite treats and snacks. If they have a long-term illness or are facing a challenging recovery, consider creating a meal train where friends and family take turns providing meals on different days. This ensures they receive nourishing food throughout their recovery and takes the burden off their family.
Help with Day-to-Day Tasks
Offer to help with specific day-to-day tasks like mowing the lawn, walking the dog, picking up groceries or collecting mail. These tasks can pile up when someone is in the hospital, so offering practical help in these areas can be a huge relief.
A Comforting Care Package
Sending a care package with items that provide comfort and entertainment can be a great way to lift their spirits. This could include books, magazines, puzzles, cosy socks, a soft blanket, their favourite snacks, or a comforting hot water bottle. If they are facing a long hospital stay, include items to make their stay more comfortable, like a nice pillow, earplugs, or a cosy robe.
A Clean and Calm Space
If your friend or family member is returning home after a hospital stay, offer to help clean and prepare their space. This could include tasks like changing linens, doing laundry, or even hiring a cleaner to ensure a calm and comfortable space awaits them.
A Listening Ear
Sometimes, the best practical wish you can offer is your time and a listening ear. Let them know you are there for them and willing to listen without judgement. Whether it's a phone call, video call, or in-person visit, offering a safe space to vent, cry, or simply process their feelings can be incredibly supportive.
Remember, when sending practical wishes, it's important to be mindful of your relationship with the person and their specific needs. Use your best judgement to determine what type of support would be most helpful and always offer your wishes with empathy and sincerity.
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Frequently asked questions
It can be tough to know the right words to say to someone in the hospital. It's important to show empathy and offer comfort. If the person is seriously ill or may not recover, avoid saying "feel better soon". Instead, tell them that you're sorry they're unwell and that you're thinking of them. Sending a quick text or making a short phone call can be a great way to show you care.
Sending a thoughtful gift or card can brighten someone's day in the hospital. For example, you could send a small album of photographs of friends, family, and pets, or a funny video. If they are a fan of a particular type of music, you could send a musician to their room. If they are well enough, visiting them in person can also provide mental stimulation and a feeling of normal social interaction.
It can be hard to find the right words to write in a card to someone who is unwell. Start by thinking about how the person might be feeling physically and emotionally, and consider the nature of your relationship. If they are a close friend or family member, humour can be an effective coping mechanism. If they are an acquaintance, you could send a message such as: "Miss seeing you at the gym! Can't wait to work on hitting our squat goals once you've recovered!".
