Helping Toddlers Cope: Parents In Hospital

Hospitalization can be a stressful experience for toddlers, who may not understand their illness or the hospital environment. Close and continual parental contact is the best means of support for toddlers during hospitalization. Parents can help their toddlers feel more secure by maintaining physical closeness, providing honest and simple explanations, and engaging in play. Additionally, it is important to manage separation carefully, gradually increasing the length of time spent away from the toddler's bedside and always communicating when leaving and returning.

Close and continual parental contact is best for toddlers

For toddlers under the age of three, close and continual parental contact during hospitalisation is the best means of support. Young children generally do not understand their illness or the hospital environment and will likely be concerned about being away from their family. Being with your child in the hospital will make them feel more secure.

Toddlers may view a hospital stay or procedure as punishment for something they did. Honest, simple, age-appropriate conversations can help your child feel more secure. Reassure your child that they did nothing to cause their illness and that they are not being punished. Explain all medical procedures in an honest and simple way. Remind your child that the tests and procedures are being done to help make them feel better.

Toddlers may ask for help with things they usually do alone. This is normal. It is usually possible for one parent or guardian to sleep overnight in the child's room. Discuss this with your nurse. Before you go, let your child's nurse know that you are leaving. Being away from a parent can be a difficult part of a hospital stay for toddlers, especially those under five or six. Try short separations at first. Always tell your child that you're leaving and when you'll be back.

When you return, your child may feel anger or rejection towards you. This is normal. Children who have trouble separating may also have difficulty reuniting. Try to overcome your hurt and let your child approach you in their own way. When you can't visit, phone calls can help show you care.

Reassure your toddler that their illness is not their fault

It is natural to want to protect your toddler from the news of your hospitalisation, but it is important to be honest with them. Children are very perceptive and may imagine things to be worse than they are. They may also believe that their actions, thoughts, or feelings caused your illness.

To reassure your toddler that their illness is not their fault, spend as much time as possible with them at the hospital. Hold them, touch them, and soothe them. If you are comfortable, try to be with them during tests and procedures. Explain all medical procedures in an honest and simple way, and remind them that these are being done to help make you feel better. You could also try medical play sessions.

Remember that being away from you may be the most stressful part of hospitalisation for your toddler. Before you go, let them know that you are leaving and when you'll be back. It may be tempting to leave while they are occupied, but this may make them feel abandoned. Always say goodbye, even if it's just for a short break. Reassure them that when you return, you will always be able to find them.

When you can't visit, phone calls can help show you care. Record your voice and special messages for your toddler to play when you are not there. You could also send videos or voice notes explaining what is happening and how it will affect their daily life. Reassure them that they will be taken care of while you are ill.

Explain medical procedures in an honest and simple way

A hospital stay can be scary for a child, and they may act less mature than usual. They may also worry about being separated from their parents. It is important to spend as much time as possible with your child and to maintain their routine as much as possible. Before the hospitalisation, it is important to prepare your child for what they may experience. This will reduce their anxiety and help them cope.

When explaining medical procedures to toddlers, it is important to be honest and use simple language that they can understand. Avoid using words like 'hurt' or 'pain', and instead use words like 'sore' or 'achy'. Be honest about any discomfort they might feel, but assure them that it will only last a few moments. Remind them that the procedure is important and is being done to help them feel better. Use age-appropriate teaching materials, such as dolls, photo books, and play medical kits, to help your child understand and express their feelings.

It is also important to let your child express their fears and ask questions. Be reassuring and encourage conversation by asking open-ended questions. Praise your child during the procedure, and talk about familiar, positive things. After the procedure, follow up with your child and repeat the reasons for the procedure. Reading a book about a similar medical experience can help your child process what happened.

Maintain your toddler's routine as much as possible

Maintaining your toddler's routine as much as possible is one of the most important ways to help them cope with a parent's hospitalisation. This is especially true for toddlers, who often view a hospital stay as a form of punishment. Here are some tips to achieve this:

• Parental presence: The presence of a parent or guardian is crucial for toddlers during hospital stays. Try to spend as much time as possible with your toddler, and always inform them when you need to leave and when you plan to return. Short separations can help your toddler get used to you being away, but it's important to always say goodbye and let them know you'll be back.
• Honest communication: Have honest, simple, and age-appropriate conversations with your toddler. Explain that the hospital stay is not their fault and that they are not being punished. Reassure them that they will always be able to find you when you return.
• Play and toys: Toddlers learn best through play, so allow time for play and offer toys and colourful objects to keep them busy. Medical play sessions can also help them understand and process what is happening.
• Familiar routines: Keep to your toddler's regular daily routines as much as possible, such as meal and bedtimes. If your toddler has a favourite bedtime story, for example, make sure to include that in your nightly routine while you're at the hospital.
• Support from others: Ask family members or your toddler's caregivers to help maintain their routine. This can include taking them to their usual playgroups or activities, and ensuring they still get to socialise with their friends.

Remember, your support, presence, and involvement are vital to your toddler's sense of comfort and security during this challenging time.

Encourage your toddler to express their fears

Hospitalization can be a scary experience for toddlers, and they may have a hard time processing what is happening. Here are some ways to encourage your toddler to express their fears:

• Spend time with your toddler: Close and continual parental contact is essential for toddlers during hospitalization. They may view the hospital stay as punishment for something they did and worry about being away from their family. Your presence will make them feel more secure. If you need to take a break, inform your toddler that you are leaving and when you will be back. Short separations are recommended, and it is important to always say goodbye to avoid making your toddler feel abandoned.
• Maintain open communication: Encourage your toddler to express their fears and show that you respect their feelings. Be honest and reassuring in your responses, using words they can understand. Explain medical procedures in a simple and age-appropriate way. Reassure them that they are not being punished and that the tests are done to help them get better.
• Provide comfort and support: Hold, touch, and soothe your toddler to provide physical comfort. Allow time for play and offer toys or colourful objects to keep them busy. You can also record your voice and special messages for when you cannot be there in person.
• Involve your toddler in the process: Depending on their age and understanding, involve your toddler in conversations with doctors and nurses. This can help them feel more in control and encourage them to ask questions and express their concerns.
• Maintain routines: As much as possible, try to maintain your toddler's daily routines, including play and socialization. This can help reduce their anxiety and provide a sense of normalcy during their hospital stay.
• Address specific concerns: Toddlers may have unique worries, such as fearing that their parents won't be able to find them in the hospital. Reassure them that you will always be able to locate them and that they are not alone.

Frequently asked questions